Sunday, February 21, 2010

Favorite Thing of the Week

This isn't actually NEW. And its not REALLY the best thing of the week. I just love it. Me and a couple buddies of mine quote it aaaallll the time. This sums up my sense of humor pretty well. If you don't find it funny at all, we might be better off not being friends. I'm just saying. Enjoy.



Oh... and the next sketch ain't bad either!!

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Because it amuses me...

An IM conversation between my sister and I:
 
 Lore:  I think my right boob is smaller than my left one, my necklace always bounces over that one when I walk.

 Me:  ...nice,  you probably would walk in a giant circle if left unobstructed.

 Lore:  Well if I just watched my boobs while I walked there is a chance of that, but I try not to
 
 Me:  Well..  um.. keep up the good work.

Friday, February 5, 2010

Its your birthday, we gon' party like its your birthday

Happy Birthday Blog!!
 
My blog is turning 2.  Its a toddler now!!  Meaning I get even more reason to act out and say irresposible things.  Or at least dump whole boxes of cereal on the floor and cry when tired.  Terribly good start I think.
 
 
To celebrate we are going to go to the Melting Pot downtown tonight.  OK... thats not EXACTLY true.  We are going to the Melting Pot, but not in celebration of lovely blog's birthday (Travesty I tell you.  Travesty).  Instead we are going with money Kim gave us for Christmas, which also included hand written sentiment in which she threatened us against hooligan-like activities using said monies with severe bodily harm. 

Also we have wanted to go there forever!
 
Randy and I always talked that we wanted to go there but the Melting Pot encourages reservations and such.  If you know Randy at all you would know that making plans are not in his repetoire.  Thus we haven't been.  Kim gave us the push we needed to actually take destiny into our hands.  We invited my sister, Randy made reservations, and tonight we're gonna eat some fondue!!
 
Will keep you updated on eating of tasty things and having glorious time.

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Favorite Thing of the Week

Alas...

Its my Kindle.

I'm loving my little electronic book!! I've been book happy the last month reading The Hunger Games, the sequel Chasing Fire, The Lost Symbol, Bridget Jones' Diary and Vanish. I'm am now a good way into the novel Deeper Then the Dead and I have a half dozen books on my "Save for Later" list in my Kindle.

Convenience is the key. I just carry my Kindle around in my purse. It has a nice cover and an adorable skin. I take it out and read at lunch, when I'm waiting for my car to be detailed, while I'm getting my nails done, anytime I have a minute or two. I never lose my space, I can change my mind and switch to a different book, I can even shop for new books. It's awesome!!

My apartment is small. I'm finding it hard to find extra room for books. Now I don't have to anymore!! The Kindle stores up to 1500 books give or take and if by some freakish chance I were to fill it up I can use Amazon online to store some I'm not reading. Shazam!

So if you love books and reading, and have been stumped on what to ask for Valentines from your honey then I suggest practicing puppy dog eyes NOW. (And Randy, thanks for the bestest Christmas present ever!!)

Let me know how it goes!

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Performing your civic duty BLOWS.

OK. So yeah. It was fascinating to see our justice system at work first hand. It was also exceedingly long, tedious, frustrating and quite frankly a little bit disheartening.
If you ever find yourself headed to trial or to jury selection, here's some things, from my experience, you can maybe expect:

1. Sometimes the judge is a pretty funny guy and shares personal stories with you. Also these would be a good way to find him if your family member is convicted. You know... to talk with him. In private.

2. In jury selection sometimes you might see people you know. And sometimes because of the topic of the case you learn new things about them. Like how they live in Spanish Fork and have two kids now. Also how they are engaged to a convicted sex offender.

3. Sometimes the defence also has an attorney that is co-chairing a case cause they are new. Watch these attorneys because often they are often patronizing to the opposing council's witnesses and have absolutely no p-p-p-oker face and you can tell that they are really pissed when the judge overrules their objections. Entertaining during really long and or boring testimony.

4. When a witness is on the stand, sometimes the judge's chair breaks and he almost falls out. He almost always finds the wheel later.

5. Occasionally when the jury comes back in after a recess a juror forgets where his or her seat is and tries to jump over the row back to their seat only to get stuck. And embarrassed.

6. At times the bailiff falls asleep.

7. Its hard to get the jury to agree when when one outspoken juror in particular doesn't think that any of the testimony is evidence, that there are no facts, and that all the witnesses were either lying or having "power trips" or "bad day(s)".

8. Sometimes the trial goes on forever. So the court buys you dinner from Brick Oven. Woot! Free food.

9. Could happen that you will deliberate until midnight and the bailiff will come and ask you imploringly if you want to possibly deliberate the next day or if you are almost done. Please dear Lord, say you're almost done.

10. Sometimes as a jury you can not agree even though everyone thinks the defendant is guilty because one juror gets everyone hung up on technicalities while others wring their hands cause they just don't want to send someone to prison. And they are all 23 and younger.

11. Sometimes in their closing statement the defense council says that they aren't calling the police officer who testified a liar, then proceeds to call him a liar. Also... she is scary.

12. Be wildly entertained when in jury room, outspoken juror uses a button to summon the bailiff and gets shocked.

13. Might be you find yourself bitter yet also somewhat redeemed when the outspoken juror that had convinced everyone they couldn't convict the defendant on the evidence at hand is told by the prosecutor after trial that the defendant was not only guilty of the crime but was doing the same thing that put him in jail previously. Juror then yells at the prosecutor telling him he should have done a better job proving his case when almost all the other jurors had wanted to convict the defendant. Might want to strangle said juror. Also, give all underage girls a warning flier with the defendants face on it.

So there you are, just some things to expect while being a part of our nation's amazing justice system. I only hope there's a little blue paper in your future, good luck.
Now. Wheres my eighteen dollars!!!??