Sunday, August 24, 2008

In Memory of...


A year ago today someone that I cared about passed away. This past year since his death has been hard on a lot of people that I have come to love and care about and of course myself as well. So on this day I wanted to take a moment to touch on some of the qualities of this extraordinary young man in the hopes that as we all continue on we can try to incorporate some of those traits into our lives and learn from his example, and in turn, celebrate his life. Because if anything can be said of Kiefer, you can definitely say he was inspiring.

Kiefer had just an ineffable sence of joy about life. He had a thousand watt smile. He knew how to laugh at himself and he knew how to make others laugh. Oftentimes you laughed without even wanting to, so crazy and harebrianed some of the things he said were, but you couldn't help it. You would just find yourself shaking your head in disbelief. Sometimes Kiefer would laugh about some joke that he found so hillarious he'd fall helpless on the floor but was incapable of telling you WHY he was laughing. In those cases you basically just started laughing at him. It was like he just couldn't help it. The joy would bubble out of him like a spring.

Kiefer, much like his father, had a most definite sence of self. He didn't care what anyone else thought or said. He could as easily stand on a stage giving a monologue from Julius Ceasar or make a fool of himself in the middle of Walmart in front of a gaggle of girls as he could debate private heath care with a family practitioner. I called him "No Shame" for a reason. He said what he wanted and wore what he wanted. If that included wearing eyeliner to soccer practice and taking flack from the coach, so be it. He didn't define himself by what he wore one day or what people thought of him. So many people would try to shove this long boarding, black clothes-wearing, faux-hawk-coifed kid into a certain box, and so many were surprised when they found that he lettered in debate (a skill he undoubtably rendered from his mother), and loved writing short stories and poetry.

Kiefer LOVED. And of course was loved fiercely in return. He had a huge extended family of friends and seemed to make more everywhere he went. He had a special affinity for those in need and extended himself to people that maybe needed a friend or a shoulder. This wanting to help others spread to social causes as well whether it be Sub for Santa or children in Africa without shoes. He wanted nothing better then to make people happy. He loved passionately and gave freely to those who needed it.

While a mischevious teen fond of sneaking out and planning non-parental approved adventures with his friends, making his mom crazy, and single-handedly giving reason for parents of teenage girls to lock all their doors, Kiefer was, above all, a young man with a huge heart. He was ambitious and smart, loving and passionate, tallented and imaginative and chock full of more self confidence then a teenager should rightfully have.

I take away my own lessons from Kiefer. His legacy for me has been to try and appreciate those I love a bit more. To maybe be a bit more passionate, a bit more caring, to laugh a little more, be a little crazy sometimes, and perhaps to take more joy in my life.

I hope others who knew him do the same. I miss you Kiefer!

5 comments:

Kimberly said...

Loved it, Loved it, Loved it. You made me laugh and cry at the same time. You described Kiefer perfectly. The only thing I was wondering about was him getting the whole debate thing from his mother, have I argued with you, or have you just heard rumors.....I miss him so much. I am so proud of him and how he touch so many people in his short life. Love ya

Shamelessly said...

Kim!
No you have never argued with ME lol. I just heard the stories that you were impossible to argue with, which is why you and Kiefer would do it so well together I assume lol. I'm glad that you liked it!!!

D said...

Wow! That was fantastic. You certainly know how to make a girl tear up, but it's great to remember how much Kiefer influenced those who knew him.

FOODIE said...
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